first friend on the first day of school

we remember the names of our "first" friends on the first day of school without fail. my first girl friend in kindergarten was maryanne. in middle school, it was saumirah and alita. in college it was justin. the first person you meet on the first day of school either becomes your best of friends, or the first day encounter can be a passing moment.

susan was my very first friend on the first day of grad school. we sat next to each other to commemorate the connection of "the first friend i made in grad school". she seemed smart, funny, and bold, i was intrigued from the beginning. she spoke of her children. commuting all the way from Salem, Oregon, susan picked SU because this way she could be close to her son who was in college. she was a trained lawyer, of course, because i am after all attracted to the lawyer- type. when class was over, i followed her to the copy center, to buy our course reader. it was just like elementary school where i followed my friends around the playground, needing to be included. now, as an evolving young adult, i followed susan, naturally, instantly, feeling a sense of comfort. susan had just asked a question that left an lingering between us. what place did it come from? i wanted to know.

as the thoughts in my head almost imploded at the end of a long class, susan said, "you were quiet during class?", looking me in the eye. i felt a need to explain: "I like to listen first," i said, looking away. she could probably tell i was lying. it was obvious and she's a mother, and that was a typical "i'm not telling the truth" move. it felt unimportant to explain that i was frustrated. it felt unnerving to say their were too many people in one room, and i was hearing too many voices and the conversation was moving too fast. but susan, was keen to notice this "quiet" behavior. she somehow felt i could offer more. using mindfulness , she gently took notice. i'm thankful for that. the first day of school was exactly a week ago. tomorrow will be my second class, and i am mentally preparing myself to give a thought, share a story, or simply listen. (between now and then i have to do the reading!) i will certainly remember susan as a notable first. i hope we remain friends.